it was called JR's.
my first night,
I met and talked with a table of three butches
each with at least 20 years on me
I remember one of them noticed my Justins, complimented me on their care
my first night,
I danced with a boy
underage like me
I remember he wore a thin red flannel shirt, smelled like spearmint, and said he took the Greyhound most weekends, 3-hour round trip
my first night,
all queens were working
giving away shots in test tubes
I remember being called "baby" and "sweetheart" so many times, and how it felt like home.
my first night,
stepping out for some air
around the side of the building with the smokers (I didn't, yet)
I remember the feel of my hand on my knife in my pocket, just in case
my first night,
staying until close
riding back in Walter's car, windows down
an early morning line cook shift awaiting me,
tired and wired
and as far as I ever heard
nobody died that night,
my first night
